Just some random thoughts

So I found out today, as I suspected, that my X is indeed "following" (insert the word "stalking") my blog.  Holy crap!  Why am I even writing this anymore?  Why have I not made this completely private and hidden away my life?  Because I refuse to let even one more peice of our normalcy be ruled by someone out of touch with himself and the world around him.  I refuse to live in fear. 

My kids and I live as normal a life as we can, given our circumstances.  In many cases, it may be more successful, more happy, more full of growth and great expectations than the lives of others I know.  I hope it is. 

Despite the fact that we are a one-parent household, we have been blessed with amazing friends, supportive relatives and the love and grace and hopefulness of God in our lives.  In three short months, we have settled nicely into a routine.  I am able to pick the kids up from school earlier than I did up in VA.  We sit down at our kitchen table and work through homework, review the day in general and talk about our upcoming week.  I fix dinner, the kids set the table, and we sit down to pray before eating.  We are silly and happy and eat our vegetables.  The kids and I are going to bed earlier, rising happier and feeling healthier than we have in years. 

We've banished electronics and tv to only 1 to 2 hours on a Friday or Saturday evening and the results have been mind boggling!  The kids are waking on weekend mornings and playing together for hours in ways I haven't seen them play together since infants.  They are being creative, and building and drawing and scheming and acting and helping and working together, because the TV and Kindles are no longer ruling their lives.

We have made pancakes and bacon and oatmeal and orange juice a tradition for breakfast on weekends.  My Dad always comes over and brings me a cup of coffee.  And Renton is making the pancakes himself!  (His specialty this morning was Bisquick with bran and cinnamon!  Yum!)

I guess what I am trying to say is that the light at the end of the tunnel may finally be growing a bit brighter.  Sometimes I lose sight of it because of the bumps in the road and the sabotage of the rails along the way, but I know that light is there because even in the darkness, I can feel its warmth and I can hear the happy giggles of my children.