Reflecting on Last Christmas

Christmas in NC - 2010
Renton, Micky, Emily

Christmas is one of those times that you can mark the passing of a year by.  It always makes me stop and think, because I am always amazed by HOW MUCH has happened in the previous year and HOW FAR my family and I have come.

This time last year, the court had FINALLY seen fit to finalize a separation agreement (a YEAR after the separation started) and we were suddenly faced with implementing a new visitation schedule.  December 18th-  the very day we were driving down to my parents to spend the week before Christmas in NC - I was informed by the judge that as despicable as P was, "every father deserves to be with his kids on Christmas."  The fact that we'd already made plans was my "fault" and we were to bring the kids back up to VA for a four-hour visitation on the day of Christmas.  They were hard words to hear, and while I understood the principal, I also KNEW the burden the kids were about to face with the interrupted Christmas Break and a rather sudden reunion with their father (he'd been prevented by a Protective Order from seeing them at all for the past 5 months) on a rather momentous day.  Well, it wasn't the first time we'd had to adapt, and ultimately, as frustrated as I was, I knew we would adapt again.

THEN CAME THE SNOW!  The Blizzard of 2010!  Remember it?  Well it snowed us in . . . in NC.  We tried and tried to get out.  My Dad even followed us down the little back roads (in case we slid into a ditch) in a futile attempt to get to the highway to get back to VA.  I was slipping and sliding, the kids were crying, P was texting me every 5 seconds that I'd "better get the kids back up there and he didn't care how I did it!"

Well, 2 hours and 10 miles later, after passing a dozen or more cars abandonned in ditches, I finally pulled into a little gas station and called it quits.  I didn't care. I wasn't putting the kids at risk and I would face the legal consequences if I had to.  Turned out, I didn't have to.  Thankfully, P didn't follow up on his threats to "drag me back into court."  We were able to get out two days later, and P had a make-up visitation with a few extra hours added on for the inconvenience.

Well . . . that was last year.  A lot has changed.  And a lot has stayed the same.  But we are better now than we were then.  And that's the most important thing.

This year we will be adapting to yet another visitation schedule.  My parents are coming in to town.  Barry is coming in to town.  And Santa is coming in to town!  But P has the kids for 8 hours Christmas Day.  It's not the way we'd like to do it, but we've decided to do most of our gift opening and dinner making and cookie eating the day BEFORE Christmas. Santa will be saved for early Christmas morning, then the kids will go off to be with their dad.  It will be ok because it's Christmas.  And a year has passed and we are blessed with our health, our sanity, and a roof over our head.  (And a few more presents than last year under the tree. :)